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Don’t Die Like Lazarus

By Vodenyi Kivisi Hilary

It sounds so sweet, when a man tells a woman that he would take care of her. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be cared for?

As sweet as this sounds to your ears, it is actually limiting to say the least.

A man promising to take care of you, is subtly putting your destiny in his hands. It isn’t totally a bad idea, but it creates room for control.

The only care from a man that should truly impress you and make you banish your brains to Yugoslavia is that care that would mean giving you all the support you need to be what you have personally decided to be.

Say, you want to own a clothing line and he is assisting you with money and all other resources you need to make your dream come through.

If the care ends in him buying you clothes, jewelry and all other things that won’t give you an advantage to become established in life, it is not good enough. At that point you are just being a Lazarus feeding off the crumbs from the rich man’s table.

If your man cares about but you have to always run to him for your basic needs, that is not care. It only means he can pull the rugs under your feet anytime he wants.

Don’t be too quick to celebrate that sort of care.

Celebrate a man who is investing in your greatness. A man who is not too trivial as to be concerned only about little things that would pass as “the crumbs of life”.

Think big. Stop running after shawarma and trips to Dubai.

Go for independence. Let him care for you to the level of establishing you. Let him help you find your feet in life.

Don’t put your destiny in the hands of any man and go to sleep. You will wake up from a nightmare and discover that you were just a beggar.

Don’t die like Lazarus.

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